la la la :-)

“From one man He made every nation of men that they should inhabit the earth; and he determined the times set for them and the exact places where they should live.God did this so that men would seek Him and perhaps reach out for Him and find Him, though He is not far from each one of us. ‘We are His offspring.’ “

Acts 17:26-28

Some of you know how I often struggle with wondering where I belong? I just feel that I don't fit in, anywhere!!! Each time we've gone to Zambia(where I'm originally from) I've been told I speak Nyanja (my Zambian vernacular) with an accent, and that I'm now 'Swazi'. And yet in Swaziland I have constant reminders that I am not Swazi -from people's 'innocent' comments to stupid government offices(don't even get me started on that!!!! :-)). I have a lot of American friends( my brothers constantly make fun of me for being a 'Bush lover', again that's a topic for another day... :-)), and I love them to death and am so thankful for them. They joke about me being half-American, but I'm not( I am pretty much banned from applying for an American visa until 2010!! but let's not get into that!!!!!!!)...I have questioned God often- Why did you bring me to live in a foreign country? (I didn't choose to live here; my parents brought me here when I was too young to have any say!), and why did you keep me here?I want to be Zambian, but I didn't grow up there, I don't live there, and my parents never took us to visit often enough for me to 'keep in touch' with all that's going on there...I am in Swaziland...there are several benefits to being a 'foreigner'. I am such a better person because of it an I love that, but I still have asked God why I cant' just be in a place with people like me, a place where I 'belong'?

I read that verse above just now, and He answered me. Why? So that you would seek me. I know God has ordained every day of my life, in my head, I know, but just now, He spoke to my heart- everything concerning me, every decision He has made concerning my life, He has made because He loves me and He wants nothing more than for me to love Him back!!! i am a Zambian living in Swaziland with a lot of American friends :-) because He wants me to seek Him, to want Him; He is pursuing me, again, I am worth pursuing!!! He is good!!! I am in awe....

Adventures are generally more interesting than fairy tales. They introduce us to travelers; pilgrims rather than princes and princesses- real life men and women, boys and girls. We meet people to who we can relate- people just like us. They fight battles and don’t always win. They’re not always strong or pretty. They don’t always live happily ever after. They cry real tears; they feel very real pain. These are not heroes lifted high above so we can admire them from afar; they are our brothers and sisters, our neighbors, our friends. We don’t look from afar and wish we could be like them. We stand beside them; walk with them through their joys and sorrows; learn from their successes and mistakes. After we have been with them a while, we realize that we are changed for the better. We realize that we have been inspired, not by ‘great and mighty’ deeds, but by ‘little’ acts of kindness and timely words of wisdom and are better now that when the adventure begun.

I love fairy tales. I have a copy of the Beauty and the Beast soundtrack. :-) I have indulged in a good amount of chick flicks!! But there are few things I love more than taking the journey with Sam and Frodo all the way from the peaceful, safe Shire through dangerous and strange places all the way to Mordo, the most evil place. Something stirs inside of me when Frodo, at the end of the Fellowship of The Ring says to Sam, “I’m glad you’re with me, Sam.” Something in me comes alive as I watch Boromir (who just previously failed the ‘test’ and gave in the evil of the ring) fight with all his might to save two little hobbits (his friends) and is killed as a result. I watch with excitement and expectancy as Erwin chooses mortality so that she can be with the one she loves (even though she is uncertain of what their future holds). And I breathe out, greatly relieved as Sam and Frodo sit on a rock in Mordor, the ring destroyed the battle won, but not without much sacrifice- tears shed, blood spilled, real pain, very real heartache!!!

There are many times when I want life to be fairy tale. I want to magically ‘fix’ everything that’s broken. I want to make is so we all ‘live happily ever after’. I want it so that there is no pain no sacrifice and not just for my sake, but especially for the sake of those I love and care about, some really close to me, others not so close, but close enough that I care. I am slowly learning that pain, sacrifice, and tears are not fun, but they are the stuff that adventures are made up of, and that’s what life is- an adventure. From Genesis to Revelation, we read about the adventure called life. God is not a hero, above beyond reach; no! He is right beside us, experiencing life with us. He doesn’t have to, He chooses to because He loves us. He says to us,

“My lover spoke and said to me,
‘Arise, my darling, my beautiful one, and come with me.
See! The winter is past; the rains are over and gone.
Flowers appear on the earth;
The season of singing has come…
Arise, my darling; my beautiful one, come with me.’”
Song of Songs 2:10-13

Yes, God is a romantic!!! He pursues us, yes, we are worth pursuing, so worth pursuing!!!!